Hilarious! Rahul inaugurates the ‘Funny Speech trend’ in Karnataka, promising to beat his UP standard!

Troubles are unending for our poor Karnataka CM Siddharamaih! His dreaded moment has arrived! Pappu aka Rahul Gandhi, the Vice-President of Congress  has joined hands with him in the Karnataka Election Campaign vowing to drown his sinking ship even faster than UP Akhilesh Government! But hey! For us, Indians, it’s fun unlimited! Rahul Gandhi is so generous in spreading laughter at his cost and that of his shrinking Party! Yesterday, he showed a glimpse of the hilarious time ahead of us Kannadigas which looks promising to beat Uttar Pradesh Times!

Poor CM Siddaramaiah is fighting the losing battle with all his might. He has worked hard on capturing vote-bank by his caste and religion politics. He has tried to fool Muslims (12.5%) and Dalits (25%) with his vulgar appeasement called ‘Ahinda’! He has played his own community ‘Kurubas’ (7.1%) by instigating a movement of Kanakapeetha creating rift between Kurubas and Brahmins. Brahmins being just 2% can affordably be shrugged off! He has provoked Lingayats (10%) to demand for a separate religion. Funny, the worshippers of Lord Shiva won’t remain Hindus anymore! Poor fellow is working really hard to survive against BJP in the coming State Assembly elections.

Just when CM Siddaramaih comes up with one more time-tested trump card ….’freebies’, Rahul arrives and how! Siddaramaih has opened a chain of Canteens across Bangalore city which will provide food at subsidized rates.  As per the Congress tradition of naming every project under the sky after Chinese Gandhis, the chain of canteens has been named as ‘Indira Canteen’. Indira  Gandhi , who ruled India in a plum position throughout her life using the abused slogan ‘Garibi Hatao’ (Remove Poverty) has to be used for giving free meals to that ‘Eternal Garib’ after their 60 years of rule. Irony!

Well, let’s come to the funny part now! To the horror of Karnataka Congress, Rahul had to be called for inaugurating the canteen named after his Grandmaa. Rahul just flushed out the efforts of CM Siddaramaih down the drain by messing it up with his 5 minutes hilarious speech! After all the hard work of Siddaramaih, he didn’t deserve this! Poor Siddaramaih had illegally encroached lands of even Railways for the Chain of Canteens. He has struck a blow on hundreds of ‘Darshini’ hotels who provide good quality food at reasonable rates. But Pappu comes to Bangalore and spoils his cooking!

The most riotous remark that side-splited the Bangalorians  was this… “Every single city in Bangalore….every single person in every single city in Bangalore …..” Poor dim-wit should have been told about the geography of Karnataka…that Bangalore is one single city itself! One more sixter that he hit was his slip of a tongue calling Indira Canteen as ‘Amma’ Canteen! I guess Siddaramaih and team had discussed it backstage with the poor fellow how Indira Canteen can pull the votes like Jayalalita’s ‘Amma Canteen’ in Tamilnadu! One shouldn’t confuse the half-wits. It’s inhuman!

Rahul Gandhi repeated the rehearsed lines about rich v/s poor scenario with a well practiced straight face. ‘The world is an unfair place and there are many people in the city who live in huge houses, have plenty of food, drive in big cars….and for them ,food is not an issue! Well, his Italian Mamma occupies a bigger residence than Prime Minister of India since last 25 years…10 Janpath…spread over 15,181 square meters! And still she can’t accommodate her only son Rahul baba who has to occupy a separate bunglow spread across 5,022.58 square meters in the neighborhood! And the poor imbecile family is made to blabber about the poor Indians from last 70 years!

Well, though Rahul messed up Siddaramaih’s efforts to impress poor by giving food at subsidized rates, we educated lot should call their bluff. It is a tax-payers’ money which CM is misusing for his selfish motives. We, the middle-class are the biggest contributors to the Tax. We would have felt good if Siddaramaih had initiated any Skill India project, helping to enhance the earning capacity of poor youth! Here in Bangalore, a hardworking plumber/electrician/ painter/construction labor/ taxi driver/ carpenter can earn minimum Rs 500-700 per day. Giving him cheap meals might save his money for vile like drinking or laziness. But such has been the tradition of Congress who has taken India backwards in their 60 years of rule!

Now, time to chill! Enjoy the hilarious speech of Rahul Baba and have a hearty laugh!

Jyothi Suparna Chincholi